Waking up to awareness

Y’all….I’m a Texan now so I can say that! Hahah. It’s been awhile since I’ve written. If you have followed my others posts we straight up moved from Delaware to Texas and I love it here! Something about southern hospitality and people helping people. It’s so different here then the east coast.

How many of you have had a “wtf” year?? It’s been a heck of a ride this year. So many of you are waking up to being “sensitive” or simply put, an empath.

Why is this happening? Why have you always felt alone or depressed? Simply put…we are here to change the world. I believe things are changing but we as a whole need to step up and embrace it. I really should rename my blog, Messy Empath. Half the time, I don’t know what the heck is happening, who I’m picking up or what the frig this ache or pain is related to. Could it be me or the guy I’m next to. How do you tell? Do you blame on others or own up to your aches/pains. Saging, or using sage oil, walking bare foot in the grass or simply put as “grounding” is the quickest way to figure that out. Also- journaling or blogging is a great start.

Going to crowded areas- my eyes water like crazy. Being around stressed out peeps- shoulders ache like something awful. Female energy- I will feel tingles in my left calf. Male energy- right calf. My husband, currently under a whole lot of stress. I can feel his active brain every night while we turn off the lights and go to bed…and I can’t sleep because of it. We joke about it now but even though he will be laying there, quiet, he feels soooo loud and I have a hard time falling asleep because of it. Just a few examples for you. I started writing them down and really paying attention to how I feel. I highly suggest you do the same, pay attention! It will help you have less wtf moments. I also highly suggest the book- Feelings Buried Alive Never Die. OR buy the app for your phone, I think it’s $5. Anyway- There is a section in the book of ailments and what the meaning behind it is. For example- when I feel pain in my shoulders from people, looking up shoulders in the book, the first symptom of shoulder pain is “bearing burdens that don’t belong to you.”

Yes, being sensitive can be a difficult journey but we are here to help others get back in touch with humanity. Change the negative into a positive. Is this an awful gift? Not really. Trying to control it is difficult but picking up on others, being a human lie detector, helping others when you feel the sadness. We are here to change the world. You were picked to help the change and yes, you are a f’n rockstar! Have a blessed day, y’all!! Xo

One chapter closes…

This summer has been incredibly emotional for my family. In June, my husband, who works at a refinery over here on the east coast had a huge fire. A week later, over 700 employees from that company would find out via the internet/news channel that the refinery would be closing. Many hours later after the initial news broke, the company confirmed. I will not name this company but you may have already googled or have heard of this story already. The company had filed bankruptcy recently and if I am speaking honestly, we were worried before it went up in flames (pun intended). His union contract would be up in September and we were already hearing a lot of discussion of what the company wanted to take away from the workers.

Panic mode. Now over 700 people, who would be out of work by the end of August, would be looking for jobs. With a little inside help, my husbands impressive resume and god on our side, he landed a job in Texas. Holy shit. We are moving to Texas! Lemme back up just a bit- I’ve lived on the east coast, Delaware to be exact, my whole 30 something years on this planet. This summer has been the most challenging time of my life thus far. While I have tried to remain optimistic, hopeful, excited about our new adventure, I have been going through some of the darker emotions a little bit more. Guilt. Sadness. Leaving my family behind. My parents who are getting older. My dad recently having some health issues and possibly a bigger issue, which we will find out this week. Wanting to be excited but feeling guilty of the excitement while my family mourns the loss of me being near. My parents, who I love dearly, never a big emotional support system for me. This summer, I have felt more alone, then I will probably ever feel in Texas. One of my biggest fears, losing my parents. I know God’s lesson in all this is for me to feel ok without having my parents & sister near me. That I can be strong on my own. Let me repeat that….that I CAN be strong on my own and that it is ok for me to live & go forward in my own life and not have to worry about everyone else’s needs. I have always put others first. This move will force me to focus on myself for once, which has been long overdue. Thanks for reading and hey!-the next time I write, I may be a Texan. Later y’all ;). Xo

Spirit

As Empaths, we “feel” more then any other ability out there. A little background-the past few months have been a little tough on all of us as we are relocating from the east coast to the southwest.

My son, 13 1/2, is taking it pretty hard (leaving his friends, changing schools) and has been wanting to sleep in my room with me. I’ve been allowing it as I believe to nuture and protect as much as possible, classic Cancer, lol. Both of my sons are sensitive also. Lately, my eldest has been having more nightmares which is another reason he is wanting to feel protected and asks to sleep in my room.

Anyway, last night. Both of my kiddos in my room (hubby has midnight shift work and not home), made it extremely hard for me to fall asleep. Tons of energy swirling around. Fell asleep around midnight only to wake up at 3:30. Tossed and turned for over an hour. Finally gave up and took my stuff to sleep in my oldest’s room as I feared I kept stirring the kids by tossing and turning. Took a sleeping pill and fell asleep in about a 1/2 hour. So I am asleep in my sons room (who has been having the nightmares) and hear a whisper in my ear (which sounds exactly like an Amazon Alexa). “You have a spirit in your room” and then waking up from sleeping on my right side I felt like something was pushing me down, holding me in place. I screamed “NO” and “GET OFF ME” and managed to run out of “C’s” room and back into my room. I’m not a fan of things messing with me while I sleep. Needless to say, I saged my whole home and set my boundaries yet again. Spirit is not allowed to bother me while I sleep. I want to see spirit & hear spirit but when spirit touches me its kinda freaky, although, that is an empaths first ability. I am trying to learn how to not be scared of spirit but I don’t like things bothering me in the middle of the night at the witching hour, ya know?

* Side note- I do not believe it was astral travel. Especially since I heard a voice.

Anywho- Do you see, hear, feel spirit? Would love to hear other stories. Have a great day and thanks for reading!! xo

Is the universe talking to you too?

It started about 2 years ago. The number sequences. 111, 222,333,444,555,777,1234,123,456 and so on. I have three numbers I get quite a bit…911,808 and 439. All these numbers have a different meaning. My husband didn’t understand the craziness of it all until recently. We took a long drive to Florida over spring break. I would point out license plates, our car clock, mileage. It’s really all day long and I don’t even stare at the clock all day. I have a digital clock in my bedroom and now I cover it up at night time because if I wake up during the middle of the night, you can bet your ass its 2:22. It happen my past birthday, I was born on the 2nd. Woke up at 2:22 am. I do believe that was actually my grandmother saying hello to me that time. Back to the traveling for spring break. It was a long car ride. We came home in one day. 20 hours about. We are all super cranky. I did a lot of the driving and was just done with it. We finally got home around midnight but beforehand I saw 11:11pm. Ok angels…I get it. I am one with the universe right now and I appreciate the guidance but I’m feeling grumpy as hell. So please continue to watch over us as we head home and send more numbers tomorrow. HA!

I also get tons of animals sent to me. My most common is birds. I did see a snake yesterday and I looked up its spiritual meaning, it totally fit.

If you pay attention, the answers are already there. It’s up to you if you walk forward with eyes wide open or eyes wide shut.

It was all a dream…

But I wasn’t reading any magazines. LOL. Took ya back to the 90’s, perhaps?

I was astral projecting the other night and it was scary as heck. Don’t you hate the feeling? Feeling stuck, cant wake up, cant move. It really is a freaky thing if you don’t know how to handle it. I’m in my bed. I realized its a dream but nothing I can really do but just try to get out of the paralyzed state. If I’m going to go through the motions of astral travel, why can’t I actually have fun with it? I don’t want it to be scary. Hoping to hear from others that have experience with it. I have a lot of topics I am researching, I guess this one will be added to my list.

When it comes down to it, don’t we all feel stuck in some sort of area in our life? How do we handle it? Ignore it and hope it goes away. Suck it up and just deal? Or figure out how to embrace the shit and go forward with life? It seems to always be a lesson though, doesn’t it?

Empaths- a little on self identity and relationships

Who the hell am I? Anyone know? LOL.

I have been trying to figure this out for a very long time. I’m a mother, a wife, a daughter, a sister and all of those help to mold me…but without all of that….who am I? Being an empath, being around others and sucking in others energies for so long…I forgot what makes me tick…what makes me, me and finding those things in the world that make me happy. Now don’t get me wrong, my kids are my everything, the make me extremely happy although sometimes being a parent can be challenging. Being a wife can also be very challenging as well. My husband (Scorpio) have been together for 15 years. I love him dearly too but since we are both water signs and emotions can be pretty extreme sometimes, we make it work. I’m not saying my marriage is perfect by any means but we are trying to find a balance through it all. Before I really realized all this empath stuff, I knew that I require a lot of down time to myself. I can not be around noise or people constantly or I will be a cranky, jerky girl. LOL. Before he would take offense to that, if I would disappear and go hang out in the bedroom to recharge. He is finally understanding my needs and honoring what I need. I require downtime/alone time daily to recharge. Hands down. I need this. Before I would get guilted if I did that. Now he honors and respects what I need and I so appreciate my husband allowing me to now do this.

Back to self identity, being an empath, putting others needs as ease and forgetting about my needs for so many years. I’m not sure if you would really label that as an empath or a healer, which I am both. I dabble a bit in palmistry. If you have a bunch of vertical lines under your pinky finger, your dominant hand, chances are you are a healer. That’s not the only sign of being one but just wanted to share that little fun fact. Hey, ya learn something new everyday. LOL. Another sign would be a great need to want to help people, animals, the planet, etc. So here I am, wanting to save everyone but have my own healing to do but that’s me, always putting others before myself. Does it make sense that I dont know what makes me super happy since I have been paying attention to everyone elses needs but mine for so many years? Yes, it totally does. I am working on it. Thank you for letting me share my stories with you. They say journaling is a great way for self expression.

Besides family stuff here are a few things that make me happy:

Sunshine

Warm temperatures

The beach, pool, bathtub. (This crabby needs her water)

Beautiful scenery

Hikes

Waterfalls

Traveling

Cooking

Animals

Softball, Basketball, maybe even running LOL

Psychic stuff, astrology, numerology, higher learning, spiritual stuffs.

Stay tuned for more stuff I hope to add as I am finding myself after almost 39 years. What makes you thrive? Thanks for reading. Have a beautiful day! Xo

Empath or faker?

I believe there are empaths. I believe some of us can feel more then others. I believe there are psychics. Does it mean that I believe every psychic who claims they are psychic are? No, I don’t. I believe some exist, who truly want to help others and I believe we have the fakers out there doing it just for the money but its their journey. Who are we to judge that?

Do we all have psychic abilities? Yes. We do. Some are able to access it easier then others. Does it make them better then you? Absolutely not. If any empath, psychic is walking around acting more superior or believes they are more superior, question that, because that sounds very superficial.

I get it…the word “empath” has gotten a lot more attention over the past few years but maybe its a good thing. Some of us are finally understanding more about ourselves. I have always felt different. Not always able to relate to others. Did I have childhood trauma? No. I didn’t. If you have read my first post, I mentioned that I am a cancer and the moon rules my emotions. I actually had an amazing birth chart done recently. Stephanie Cotton. Google that girl. It was amazing.

All in all, do I need a label? No, I don’t. Has it helped me understand myself a little more? Yes, it has and it is creating awareness. Bottom line, I know that I am a sensitive being trying to make a difference in this world. That I do know and it will be done without judgement on my part. My journey is mine and your journey is yours. Be true to yourself. Don’t let others dim your light. There will always be skeptics, non-believers out there and again, it’s ok. Walk your walk and put trust in yourself. This is your life experience and I hope it is a good one.

Thanks for reading. Xo